THE You've been followed here. We're all in danger. FILES   You're being watched.
by Untrue News paranoia editor Hyman Hayden**

How did you find us?


Anonymity is Crucial.

Can you find me? No. Why? Because I have taken great pains to become anonymous, something nearly impossible to do in the United States of America. I have no social security card. I have no driver's license. I have no cell phone, and no regular telephone, listed or unlisted. I do not own property. I do not subscribe to any magazines, nor do I have any charge accounts or bank accounts. I pay cash for everything. I have no insurance. I have no email address.

So will someone please tell me how the hell Publisher's Clearing House keeps sending me these sweepstakes letters? Thanks.

 --H.H.

(**NOTE: Hyman Hayden is a member of the Paranoid Alliance for Personal Protection (PAPP) and is licensed to carry a concealed weapon.)

Talk back to Hayden

[Untrue News]  Home ] [ The Alienator ] [ Eye Cams ] [ Gregory Coleman - Alien Assasin ] [ Miss Cleo -- Defend yourself with Rock Salt ] [ Editor is Alien Agent ] [ VP Cheney - Alien Tool ] [ Alien Cats ] [ Alien Brainwashing ] [ Our Pets are Alien Spies ] [ I remain Anonymous ] [ Your Computer transmits to the aliens ] [ Dental Implants - they are listening ] [ Encoded Tread Marks ] [ Sleep - Your Worst Enemy ] [ Brainwashing Through Cigarette Smoking ] [ Newspaper - Silent Killer ] [ Implanted tranceivers ] [ Subliminal Influences - Your Mind at Risk ] [ Questions about Roswell ] [ Silver, not tin! ] [ Toilet Listening Device - You're Bugged! ] [ The Number 12 ] [ Alien Virus - Mind Control ]  [Town Meeting]   [Christianity]   [Interfaith]  [Pagan Circle]  [Messages]